Please Little Lamb

        I know you aren't trying to hurt me, but that is what is hurting me the most. Can't you see that I treasure every moment I'm with you? I still have the letter you gave me a year ago, and I read it constantly. I bet you didn't know that I still have it. I don't even know if you remember writing it. Reading it makes me feel so complete. For the one minute that I read it, I actually feel like I've made an impact on someone's life. Then the words fade, and with it, the grand feeling. I want to believe that those words are still true, but it's starting to look just like ink on paper to me.
        Sometimes people leave you, halfway through the wood, but some will fade in and out. We have one year left until you fade out, and I hope you can fade in for some of the time before that. My biggest fear is regret. Don't make me regret our distance this next year. I love your honesty, your smile, your love, your realness. I thought I didn't need to put on a big show for you to stay, I still don't think I do, but that's what I'm doing right now. Please please please stay. I have this gut feeling that you are still supposed to teach me something. Or I'm suppose to teach you something, and you can't just ignore gut feelings. I know you don't see it as throwing everything away, but that is completely how I see it. I don't want to leave on a bad note. I want to leave feeling complete, good, finished. Not with my mouth agape with wonder, confusion, and regret. I hate that word: regret. Please please please don't be my biggest regret.

I felt ok holding you,
I didn't feel fire but I felt comforted,
You are the lost lamb that can't be found,
Just as I find you,
You run away again.

Now I'm lost looking for you,
The worry that your gone for good,
The feeling that I need to look a little harder,
The regret that I hope won't follow.

Please be one less regret in my life.